Meat Cute
by TwinGleeks101
Summary: Soos and Melody drabbles! Rated T for slight language but nothing too bad!
1. Chapter 1

**Hello everybody! It is us, Georgia and Charlotte back from our first year of university! Seeing how we have eight more weeks to kill and love Gravity Falls with a burning passion as well as Soos/Melody, we figured why not combine them? Also because as far as my research goes, the internet is pretty lacking in Soos/Melody fics. I've found like, two? So here's a proper Soos/Melody fic for all you shippers out there! Peace Out! TG101 :-D x**

Melody sighed, looking out of the window as the bus pulled away from Gravity Falls. She had barely been on the bus ten minutes and was already missing Soos. His adorable awkwardness, his spot on beaver impression; even his snoring which was pitch for pitch the same as a chainsaw. Due to time and money constraints, the next time they could even consider seeing each other wouldn't be for another two months and even then, it would only be the weekend.

Shuffling down in her seat, she put in her earphones and pressed play on her phone.

* * *

Soos waved goodbye as the bus pulled out of the depot. Now was the time to put his plan into action. According to the internet, it would take somewhere around the four hour mark to get to Portland, not including bathroom breaks. So he enlisted the help of the gnomes to help stop the bus, thus rendering it helpess for at least an hour if not more; plenty of time which to get to Portland!

He too missed Melody; he missed the scent of her watta-lotta-melon shampoo, the fact she often twitched in her sleep and even her adorable little mumblings.

"Okay dudes, it's safe now," he said to no one in particular. A rustling came from the trees as the gnomes dropped down from them, all of them landing swiftly on their feet except from Schmebulock.

The gnome got up, shook his head and raced to join the others where Soos was instructing them on their mission "...Portland so I can propose to Melody and this is where you guys come in."

Jeff nodded, clearly interested. "All right then, big guy. But I have one question."

Soos knew what to expect and pulled out four hessian bags from his rucksack, all of which were glowing. "Jeff likes, Jeff likes. You've got a deal."

As the gnomes raced after the bus, Soos got into his pick up truck and smiled. He knew there was no one else on earth he'd rather spend his life with. Her whole family loved him! Except maybe for Ya Ya who in her words described him as a "bad gopher, go back to woodpile".

* * *

Melody was looking out of the window and was on the verge of nodding off when a loud 'BANG!' made her sit up, suddenly awake. "What the-"

Next thing she knew, the bus was careering out of control and everyone but her was screaming in fear and panic.

"We're gonna die!"

"I don't want to end this way!"

"Honey, don't go into the light!"

Grabbing onto the nearest handrail, the bus skidded to a halt in the middle of the road the bus driver getting off to inspect the damage that was inflicted. "I don't know how this could've happened," he muttered, scratching at his balding head "I swore she ran fine at her last test five years ago."

Melody rolled her eyes. Great, now they were stuck. Mumbling to herself, she got out her phone and texted her mother a quick message.

 _Hey Ma, bus in trouble, no one hurt but gonna be late. M x_

"Okay everyone, off the bus!" the driver declared, climbing back on board. "Nothing to be worried about! Seems we've ran over some glass! I called the company and there should be a replacement in the next two hours."

Out of sight of the bus and people, the gnomes were high fiving each other on a job well done."Excellent work you guys!" Jeff announced as he kicked the pocket knife into the bushes.

"Now come on! Back to Gravity Falls!"

* * *

"Hey lady, wake up!"

Melody swatted the hand away as she awoke, realising it belonged to a young boy who looked like he was barely ten years old. "Hmm?" she mumbled, wiping away the drool which had made its way down her cheek.

"We're at Portland," he explained bluntly hitching up his backpack. "Mom saw you get on and she knew you were OBVIOUSLY headin' to Portland 'cause this was the only bus headin' this way and she didn't want you to sleep till the driver kicked you off."

"Oh, thanks kid," she mumbled, cursing silently at her headphones which had decided to tangle themselves whilst she was asleep. "Why does this always happen to me?" she groaned, stuffing them in her bag as she gave a stretch, feeling all her bones click. Glancing out the window she gave a nostalgic sigh. No matter how much she claimed Portland to be a dump and couldn't wait to move out for good, she was always drawn in to the weird charm that it had to offer. It was home after all and it's pretty much all she ever knew having moved there from Massachusetts when she was five.

As she grabbed her bag and headed off the bus, she half expected to see her family waiting for her; Ya-Ya, her elder brother Michael, her younger sister Nelly, her mom and dad and Soos. Wait, Soos?

Blinking to made sure she saw right she gasped as she saw right. It was Soos. With a sign which read "Mrs Ramirez (Please?)".

Holy crap, he was proposing. Soos was actually smiling from ear to ear, she ran up and jumped onto him, almost knocking him over.

"Holy...Soos! How did you get here?" she asked, babbling her words. "I mean, why? How?...How?" she stopped mid sentence as he put a finger to her lips and put her down before kneeling on one knee.

"Okay...so um...you know I love you so much dude, like my heart bar is overflowing and um...I wanna spend the rest of my life together y'know so I guess what I'm asking is..."

Melody nodded and burst into laughter, tears forming in her eyes "Yes yes yes!" she repeated and hugged him tight, giving him a shaky kiss."Of course I'll marry you."

There were cheers and claps of congratulations as Soos put the ring on her finger. Examining it, she began to sniffle. It was a beautiful silver band with a diamond in the centre with tiny diamonds and light blue gems studded around it. As Soos stood up, she kissed him again

"I love you so much, Soos," she whispered, sighing as she was enveloped in a hug.

"Me too, dude. Me too."


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello! T'is I Georgia coming to you from my bedroom! Not a lot has been going on since university has finished only that I need to get back before my sanity wears out -.-" I've been back to uni once that was about a month ago, I have a job, got paid and that's it really. I want to get journal 3 which Charlotte has and it's beautiful! So good! My personal favourite episode of GF would either have to be Northwest Manor Mystery or Society of the Blind Eye. I remember we were watching SOTBE and the ending got us shouting in realisation. I also love the fact that in Gobblewonker McGucket is seen as the town kook but then we realise WHY he's that way! Peace Out! TG101 :-D x**

"...yes, I know, ma. Okay. Mom! I do not need to know that! Yes, I love you too, mom. Okay, gotta go, bye!" Melody groaned out loud and flopped onto the couch and straight onto Soos' chest. She'd just been on the phone to her mother who wanted to meet "the nice boy you're going to marry."

They'd been together for two months and after the events of Weirdmageddon, Melody decided to help Soos out with the running of the shack until he got used to things. After that, she wasn't sure what they were gonna do. Soos was on about expanding the shack to a theme park as well but after the backyard rollercoaster incident which landed him in hospital, that idea went out the window.

"Is everything alright?" Soos asked as Melody put the phone back on the stand, sticking his tongue out in concentration as he began to kill more zombies. "Die you heathens!" he laughed cheering as the "you won!" sign appeared on screen.

"It's my Mom. She wants to meet you."

"And?"

"And I don't know if I can do it! I don't know if they'll like you. I like you of course," she reassured him giving his cheek a stroke. Soos smiled, squeezing her hand. "But it's just my family I'm worried about...especially Yia Yia."

She'd talked about her family before and how her mom's side were the most cut throat no bars held back Greeks imaginable, whilst her dad's side of the family were Jewish immigrants straight out of Manhattan. With such opposing forces, she'd grown up in a house where disagreements were often but never lasting, everyone was completely blunt with their opinions and the drink was always flowing.

She'd also told him about her Grandma who was known to the family as Yia Yia. She was an eighty year old Greek woman who had twelve children, meaning Melody had a plethora of aunties and uncles, and of course they married to Greek heritage and then produced more babies, and so on and so forth. She had lost count after thirty cousins and was certain more cousins had already procreated.

"I wouldn't worry too much, Mel. Old ladies love me!" Soos reassured, rubbing her back. "And besides, I've grown up with Abuelita, what could go wrong?"

* * *

"Hey mom, we're back!" Melody called through the seemingly quiet house. She knew it wasn't going to be like this for too long what with seven people all under the same roof. "Mom? Dad?"

"In the kitchen!" she heard a voice shout from the door on the far right. Following the voice, Melody opened the door and a wave of sound hit her. Music was being played, her brother was arguing with her father, Nelly was talking the phone and Yia Yia was instructing her mother on how to make proper baklava.

"Too much!" she scolded, waving a spoon around. "Gets sticky! Not good! Too much pistachios!"

"Oh, my little Melody!" her mother cried, instantly hugging her as she noticed her come through the door. "Oh, you've grown! Hello, bubbie!"

"I've been the same height since I was twelve mom," Melody chuckled giving her a kiss on the cheek. "Oh Mom, this is my boyfriend Jesus. Soos, Mom, Mom, Soos."

"Nice to meet you Mrs Melody's Mom," Soos grinned, removing his cap.

"My, what nice manners you have Jesus, you can call me Janice. I'm sure Melody's told you all about her family. This is my husband, Frank, our daughter Nelly, this here's Michael and this is Yia Yia."

Despite her not saying a word, Soos could instantly tell that he was not liked by her."Er...hey Melody's Yia Yia," he laughed nervously, holding out a hand, which she looked at in disgust.

"No good. Ochi kala," she stated, now glaring at him. "Too fat. What does he do?" she asked staring at her grandaughter. Before Melody could answer, Yia Yia interrupted "Eh probably kiosk job...not good."

And with that, she began to shuffle out of the kitchen, mumbling to herself.

Melody felt herself blush but Soos laughed it off. "Not technically dudes. I'm the owner of the Mystery Shack and also a handyman when I need to be."

Yia Yia paused and turned around. "You handyman? You fix dryer?" she asked still sceptical. "I have been telling Janice dryer needs to be fixed. She no listen. Dryer may be old, but like Yia Yia, it still works. Perhaps you can look?"

"Yeah, I can do it. Just show me what needs doing and I'll fix it."

As Soos followed the older woman, Melody sat down at the table. "So? What do you think?" she asked, blowing on the cup of coffee her mother places in front of her."I know he's not what you guys expect or even want but -"

"As long as you're happy," Janice interrupted, putting her hand on Melody's. "That's all I care about. I will say this, though. He's better than the magician."

"I'll say," Melody laughed, taking a sip of the beverage. "It's nice being in a relationship. I thought that during college I'd find "the one" but I think it seems that there's other plans for me," she said fondly, looking at her boyfriend, who was interacting with her grandmother.

* * *

"I still no trust you Soos, but you treat Melody good and I respect that. Good boy always treat women nice, especially their Yia Yias!" Yia Yia laughed slapping Soos on the back. "Come, come, I serve baklava, you like baklava?"

"Oh sure Mrs Xanthopoulos," Soos grinned, following the old woman back to the kitchen. "Honestly I don't know what it is but if it's food then I'll anything."

"Good job, Melody. He is nice boy. I like," she praised. "He may be fat and look like beaver, but he is good with hammer." Melody smiled and gave Soos a kiss on the cheek.

"Well if you're liked by Yia Yia then I guess you're welcome in the family."

"She seems a little scary and intimidating but all around a lovely lady," Soos stated, giving her hand a squeeze.

"Oh, and one more thing, Soos," Yia Yia said as she put a plate of baklava down in front of him."If you get Melody pregnant, there is me to deal with," she added sweetly laughing as she saw the look on his face.

Soos gulped nervously. They hadn't even got that far so there wasn't a chance of that happening. He had been hoping this was the weekend it would finally happen and had even gone to the drug store in town for supplies, despite the knowing looks from the locals.

* * *

Soos rolled over and sighed. He couldn't get to sleep despite it being nearly three in the morning and he didn't want to disturb Melody. Getting out of bed, he decided to get a drink and then try and get some sleep. As he headed downstairs, he was surprised to see the kitchen light on and to find Yia Yia smoking a cigarette, nursing a cup of milk.

"Ah Soos," she murmured, taking another sip "Come, sit down, Yia Yia wants to talk."

Soos sat down nervously next to her, eyeing the old woman cautiously. He had no idea what she was going to say; maybe something about her being in the Greek Mafia? Or an illegal olive baron?

She took his hand in her old leathered one and spoke softly. "Yia Yia is getting old, she is not going to be around much longer. You be good boy for her, okay? For Yia Yia? My Melody she uh...has insecurities...she doesn't like getting close because men hurt her. Is all in the past of course, but she no forget, she a smart cookie. Anyway, you look after her make sure she is loved and loves in return. She got a lot of love to give but give it all to wrong people. I trust her not to make mistake but it's sad when she does. But you...Yia Yia see's you're special."

Soos smiled, feeling his eyes fill with tears. It was clear Yia Yia noticed, as she elbowed him in the ribs.

"It's okay, you cry. I not tell. In fact Yia Yia keep it to herself. Yia Yia has many secrets."

Soos looked at her with a slight worried look on his face. Maybe she was an illegal olive baron after all.


End file.
